You push me away when I need you the most. You see me only when it’s convenient for you. You haven’t even noticed that you’ve been killing my insides. You take my words for granted and ignore the fact that you’re hurting me. You’ve left me alone on the darkest nights and I’ve cried in the shower to hide the tiers and then go back to the happy wife that you so desperately need. 

You let me see the demons within. I surprisingly said: “What beautiful Creatures I see”

Past Lashes

“I drink the venom of the past and I lash at my wrist to hurt what is left of what is still alive in me. Desperately trying to wake her suppressed voice. I grow crazier and crazier.”

Tired

I’m tired. 

From the simplest 

to the most complex 

of ways to be tired. 

Physically 

and 

Emotionally 

tired.

Muted

“Muted by horrors of the thoughts in my mind.
What have I done? What have I done? 

Chest hurting, knot forming, 

muted by the horrors in my mind.”

Winner Takes It All

 

 

I’m trying to move on

And your voice won’t let me.

The ringtone on my phone

Is blowing up with our song.

The answering machine still has us talking;

Saying “We’ll be back soon.”

I let myself be fooled by your smile and your eyes

Your sweet voice and long night we used to talk about love

But all that is over

No more sweet talk or hugs

No more love; or at least not seen by the naked eye

 

I am done playing little games

That only end up in your victory

“Winner takes it all” said by my favorite song

And yes, you played all your cards

This time you ran with luck

Luck ever lasting

 

“Winner takes it all”

And I stay in the dark

As a result of losing this game

Were you have all the good cards

All the right things to say

The sun was rising while the moon was still in sight. Slowly opening the eyes of shame. She remembered the sinful night of which she had slept through. The voice of her lover scratched her ear with the most beautiful words she had ever heard. While he spoke, the alarm went off. It chuck her into panic. It was a dream! But it was so real. I heard him! I did! He was here, next to me, hugging me with his strong arms and sweet voice. And it happened; me and him; him and I; together.   

Afraid

 

I am afraid.

Afraid to fall,

To hurt myself;

Afraid of regret and lies

But I am specially afraid of love

Of that feeling so dangerous,

So strong.

So pure beyond understanding,

Beyond the fact that love lies, love hurts.

Love kills the largest and strongest man on earth.

But your love is silent.

It is care.

Disguised by a mask;

Camouflaged with pride.

So what do we do with this fear to fall?

To fall and not be catch.

Maybe, just maybe you will catch me

And I will catch you,

And we will cherish our love forever.

I'm a wreck glued with blood, bones, and flesh; a story with no end; a smile halfway. With words erased, scratched, and written again. An almost faded past by the smiles of the present. I build myself, and tare myself down, only to build a "ME" even stronger. I am not haunted by the lies, nor the tears I´ve cried. But, accompanied by the certainty that tomorrow will be bright, because after a sunset, comes a sunrise.

Without You

Half awake, in a dream that seems more like a night mare

But that’s just my reality;

Hell without you.